So absurd it doesn't deserve a Title!

Ever since I moved back to Reno from Fairbanks I have been obsessing about Alaska. I know I need to finish school, that was my main reason for coming back home after the election. I know there where times I was scared to death being away from my friends and family and was kind of miserable while I lived in Fairbanks but now that I have been home for about four and half months I am starting to realize how much I miss Alaska. 

I really do want to move back to Alaska but I don't know what I would do for a living. I have huge goals and ambitions for the political world. I know that DC is the place to be. I also love Nevada politics BUT then I keep on discovering that I love Alaska and I want that state to become my home. I know I am crazy but I love it.

I am still debating with myself about whether I am gonna go back after I graduate or not. It is a huge roller coaster. I used to think I had my entire life planned out but I always gave room for change. Now I have no clue at all what I am doing. Is this apart of growing up??? Or is it that I am just discovering new things about myself? Am I challenging myself in life? I have no clue. What I know is that I want to have two things that I can't. I suppose that is apart of Kierkegaard's idea of absurdity. Even though I know I am far from being a Knight of Faith or Resignation. But I do understand his idea of absurdity. That is what I am stuck in. The world of absurdity. 

I also know that if I where to move to Alaska again I would have more opportunity for jobs in Anchorage but after living in the interior of Alaska I don't think I could live in Anchorage. Who knows. Like I said I had my life planned and now it is changing rapidly. 

I think I just want out of Reno again because I am even considering Vegas if I where to do Night Life PR (see previous blog) or even SF. I am just lost. All what I know is that I need to graduate. Can I do it in one year? I hope so. It is my goal to be graduated by summer 2010. I have finally figured out how to do that. Until I figure this out I am just going to continue living and let life take me where it is taking me.